I’ve often heard husbands express a common concern: “It’s so difficult to understand my wife. One moment she wants something, and the next, she doesn’t. She’s full of excitement one day, then sad the next. She feels loved at times, but in our next conversation, she might not feel that way.”
So, how do I handle this? I want her to know I care deeply for her.
After reflecting, I thought of a few steps we could try to make progress:
- Show respect – Always listen to her, value her input, and consider her needs, even if they’re hard to understand.
- Speak her love language – Pay attention to what makes her feel cherished. Whether it’s through gifts, quality time, or physical touch, show her she’s your number one priority.
- Carry her burdens – When life feels heavy for her, step in and help carry some of the load. Give her space to rest emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
- Show affection – Women often crave attention outside the bedroom. Hold her hand, rub her back, and make touch a priority in your relationship.
- Allow her to be herself – You fell in love with her for who she is, so encourage her to pursue new interests and friendships. Celebrate the person she was yesterday and be excited about who she’s becoming.
- Treat her better than a stranger – Sometimes, we treat those closest to us the worst because we feel comfortable expressing ourselves fully. Take the kindness you show to strangers and offer it to your wife.
- Pray with and for her – There are times when it’s hard to understand what’s going on in her mind or heart. In those moments, cover her fears, worries, joys, and challenges in prayer. She will feel comforted when you pray with her.
- Ask her how to love her – There are countless ways to make your wife feel loved. Simply ask her what makes her feel cherished, and she’ll appreciate your willingness to learn and grow together.